We probably all know by now that men love to “fix” things. Even when we all we really want them to do is listen and empathise, they rush in to give us solutions and advice. They’re wired to protect and serve us, to handle challenges for us and put things right. It’s endearing in many ways, but also frustrating because when we DO want them to fix something like a leaky tap, it seems to take them forever! Why is that?
You can save a lot of time, frustration and nagging and get him to tune in to what you need and help you almost immediately, simply by including one word when you ask him to do something.
And that word is …. PROBLEM!
If you want him to do something, tell him you have a “problem” and ask him if he would fix it for you. “Hon, there’s a problem with the tap in the bathroom – could you fix it for me please?”
If you want his advice, tell him you want his opinion about a “problem”. “Hon, I have a problem and I don’t know what to do. I’d appreciate your advice.”
You’ll get a much faster and more focused response than if you’d said “Hon, the tap’s leaking” or “Hon, we need to talk about x.”
Use his innate desire to rise to the challenge and find a solution in a way that makes him feel good and you feel taken care of.
Try rephrasing what you want him to do as “fixing a problem” and let us know in the comments how well it works for you 🙂